Working with family conflicts can be a challenging task for counsellors. In a collectivist society, such as Afghanistan, where interactions between people of the opposite sex are highly regulated, counselling sessions with an individual involved in a family conflict may not be very effective unless conducted in a culturally sensitive manner. As asking for help from professionals may be considered to be ‘lunatic’, as well as a potential threat to the honour of the family, family counselling is not often easy to carry out and may actually pose risks to the client and to the counsellor.

This personal reflection examines the author’s experience while conducting qualitative research on the traumatic life events and coping among the female workers in Kabul University’s dormitory for female students. It also describes the experiences of one of the study’s participants, a woman who suffered from severe domestic violence and enacted various ways of active coping.

The hypothesis of secondary traumatization argues that children raised by parents who were traumatized by war, have more mental health problems than other children. Past evidence for this hypothesis is not consistent.

By learning to identify feelings and express emotions, children can better cope with the difficulties they face, as well as increase their personal resilience. As the Syrian crisis has entered its seventh year, it has had a negative effect on vulnerable populations, especially children. It should be noted that while not all children have been traumatised, many have experienced conflict and crisis, and in turn face challenges expressing and regulating their emotions and behaviour.